New babies time and making income

I know having an 8th month old is overwhelming time wise. They need every second you might have available. I remember not showering for 4 days until I just brought her in the shower with me and settled for colder showers.

Shaving my legs was a pipe dream, I felt lucky just get get my hair washed.

It does get better.

I was divorced when my youngest was 6 months old with a 4 year old also. Two months later I started a job as a software engineer at a startup. It was not easy but that was 6 years ago and we all survived. I work at home 3 to 4 days a week. Granted my house is a mess but I also have two large birds(Macaws), two large dogs, 5 cats and 2 guinea pigs to take care of (all rescued from some bad situation or another). I also lead two girl scout troops and volunteer at my daughters schools and at church. So I can really relate to being busy and being the only adult in the household with time to make it all work. Being busy does not create stress unless I let it. That is under my control but I do let is get to me from time to time. Stress is created when I beat myself up for not getting everything done or look at the big picture and try to imagine it getting done at the same time.

You need to stay relaxed and happy to keep your daughter the same. Your state of mind if the most important thing when being a parent. Debt overwhelming your life which is where your headed because there is no 2 year workable plan using credit card debt to supplement your income that won’t get out of hand. 6 to 10 months maybe but those minimum payments lead to more and more credit card use which lead to higher and higher payments.

Keeping cool and calm under this kind of stress will not be any easier then trying to work part time and deal with that stress. In fact getting out a bit might even make it easier. When you work and you have childcare you don’t need more time because your paying for someone else’s time. Childcare and taxes can make a $500 need into to $2000 need because working has its own expenses when it is done outside the home.

Ideally doing something that does not require childcare would be best and one that you can include your daughter would be ideal. That is why I suggested you see about providing childcare for 1 child. Watching two children is not must different then 1 if they nap together. Your free time will be the same. If that does not appeal to you I did post some ideas before. You need to do a career type search but a little different. As I suggested look around Craig’s list in different areas and see what people are looking for and what others are offering. Consider what you enjoy and your skill set. Make a list of everything you like to do. If you find yourself craving getting out of the house for walks or drives. Walk dogs or pick up middle school kids from school and take them to soccer or music or dance classes. Look at childcare. How can you trade with someone you trust for some time to work a few hours a week. Do you have family near by who would baby sit for you? It is very easy when your overwhelmed as a new parent to box yourself in and feel unable to do anything else but an 8th month old is capable of entertain themselves better then a 4 month old and every month you will have a little bit more time. 8th month olds love the action of another child around. Leaving an 8th month old with a babysitter is very different then leaving a 4 month old. But never never leave a child with anyone you are unsure of in anyway. Your daughter comes first and if necessary use credit but I think you can find another way if you keep an open mind.

The truth is your daughter will not remember if you were home or not in the next two years. If she is getting good care and she is happy then that is all that really matters. For you to be a good parent you need to keep your stress level in check. Taking care of yourself is therefore very very important. Money and lack of it creates stress if you let it, but in the end you are in control of that. Happy healthy children have happy healthy parents.